Re: SNOWMGWTFBBQ

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I think the snow has largely melted.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 11:56 AM
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CURSES


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 11:59 AM
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I'm sure any Mainers among us appreciate the sound advice.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:01 PM
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man, fuck maine.

I knew I shouldn't have put this post off so long.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:03 PM
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It's a delicate balance: difficult to grill in snow that still completely submerges your grill, but boring to grill when all the snow is gone.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:12 PM
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Surely you could dig out a little area for the grill. As long as it's not falling at too fast a rate, what's the problem? A little extra work will only make the finished product taste better.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:14 PM
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G.R.I.L.L.L., word up, that's the grill.


Posted by: Chubb Rock | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:15 PM
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As long as it's not falling at too fast a rate

You're trying to start derivative shenanigans again, aren't you.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:16 PM
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Ack. I am ashamed.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:18 PM
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This post has turned out to be something of an albatross for poor neb.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:19 PM
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But I hear grilled albatross is delicious.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:24 PM
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And available year round.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:27 PM
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1: I think the snow has largely melted.

My driveway before yesterday's 5 inches of fluffy.

(For extra credit find the deer browse line on the ivy on the wall)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:28 PM
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BTW, Sifu, that wasn't your house that burned down a couple days ago in that part of town, was it?


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:41 PM
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Not as far as I know, no. If it was I imagine I would have been colder and wetter last night.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:43 PM
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13: Made it to my garden plot on Monday; turned the whole thing over. Plenty of worms. I think the soil might be warm enough for me to direct sow peas. It is a little late in the year to be starting crops, but I think I can get the peas in and out before I put tomatoes in the same cages.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:46 PM
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I am looking forward to having better soil in the new back yard. The current lot was filled and doesn't grow stuff particularly well.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:53 PM
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Is the implication of the weird garden douchiness that people don't like the snow and should therefore be jealous that the central valley is 80+ and smoggy? 'Cuz I love snow.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:54 PM
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16: I hate you Megan. It will be months before I can even think about turning the soil, much less caging tomatoes!


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:54 PM
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I like that 18 & 19 were basically simultaneous.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 12:58 PM
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Gosh, I heard that this weekend might be nice enough to wear sandals. Better go pay my tiny mortgage just because it's fun.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:00 PM
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I like to think of NPH growing coffee in his backyard garden.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:01 PM
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ALBATROSS!


Posted by: OPINIONATED JOHN CLEESE | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:01 PM
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We've got seedlings for a salad mix growing indoors!


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:01 PM
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21: I just don't know what to say.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:01 PM
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Posted by: | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:01 PM
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Ben, what kind of pluck is a supply?

Or, if you are thinking that character traits can be a "supply" what kind of pluck isn't a supply?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:02 PM
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21: How are those local school textbooks working out for ya?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:04 PM
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28: We're thinking about going national!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:04 PM
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21: Hey, heebie, I hate you too! My damned mortgage is like a lead weight chained to my ankle impeding my ability to run free.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:05 PM
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29: And then someday everyone will be warm and have a tiny mortgage!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:05 PM
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Ben, what kind of pluck is a supply?

Heart, liver and lungs, I think.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:07 PM
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30: Ugh, I'm genuinely sorry. There is a danger that my kidding-gloating is actually-obnoxious.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:08 PM
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22: Hmm, might be worth a try. New place has bananas already in and some citrus that I'm hoping turns out to be a lime, but there's room for more. I'm not too happy about giving up my tangerines, but I can plant more. Ditto the avocadoes, but most of them usually get stolen anyway. And I'm debating whether to transplant the little Valencia orange tree that my s-i-l gave me because she figured she wouldn't live to see it fruit. (Watching myself type that out answers the question already--it's coming with.)


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:09 PM
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33: Oh, don't be genuinely sorry. I don't genuinely hate you. Bitch about administrative crap at work some and all will be forgiven.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:11 PM
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You should grow a miracle fruit. I've been trying for 3 years but they don't seem to like winter.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:11 PM
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heebie, I read someplace that you have a baby bump? Congratulations!


Posted by: Grover Cleveland | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:11 PM
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Sunny here, supposed to get up to 60 degrees this afternoon. Better go get some seeds. And a grill, I guess.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:13 PM
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Nope! Just warm, rich, and jiggly.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:14 PM
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35: Don't do that! If everyone would just keep this up, and start pseudo-jokingly hating on people besides heebie, this has the potential to be a hilariously catty 1200-comment thread.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:16 PM
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Boy, I sure with I could think of something slightly personal and bitchy to say about Blume right now. That would be clever and unexpected.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:17 PM
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Get a load of her husband.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:18 PM
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I bet that comment sounded better in the original German.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:19 PM
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40: Fine, then. Why don't you chip in with some gloating about your blissfully happy newlywed life? I don't mind holding down the jealously bitter end of the catty 1200-comment thread myself.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:20 PM
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Oh, I'm holding off on my gloating until I get that cushy tenure-track job at a prestigious university.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:24 PM
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Snow grill or die.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:25 PM
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OT: anti-communitarianism gone completely mad

Various French officials freaking out that a fast food chain has decided to turn some of its franchises in heavily Muslim areas halal. The mayors are threatening to shut them down, and a senior government spokesman expresses his 'inquietude'. The Socialist mayor says that a burger joint that doesn't offer bacon burgers is discriminating against its non-Muslim customers. This isn't the first such 'affaire', back in 2002, an epicerie (bodega) in another town with a large Muslim population was shut down for eliminating pork and alcohol from its shelves.

This news clearly shows that Mark 'Europe unfortunately doesn't have the sort of national spirit that it had in the thirties that would allow it to defend itself against the Muslim threat' Stein, Sen. Lieberman, and Chris Caldwell are right, Europe is being turned into a new caliphate. In other news, the fact that when I lived near a major rabbinical school, even a local Arab run and themed cafe proudly proclaimed that everything was strictly kosher, and had prominently displayed glatt kosher certificates on the walls, shows that the US is run by the Elders of Zion.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:25 PM
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45: If only you were a biologist.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:26 PM
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Guck dir ihren Ehemann mal an!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:27 PM
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46 is excellent.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:28 PM
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I pity you folks who live in strange places that don't have a real winter. I do envy the fact that coastal Californians don't have to deal with 'hot and muggy'. But snow is good, snow is fun, snow is pretty.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:29 PM
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48: I haven't checked if anyone's updated the previous thread, but apparently there are now reports that she:
Shot her brother
Was a suspect in a mail bombing
Punched someone at IHOP for taking the last booster seat
Intentionally knocked over the neighborhood basketball hoop with her truck when moving in
Anything missing?


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:31 PM
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Snow is lovely stuff. But endless gray sucks, particularly when you enter and leave the office in the dark and look out the window at gray all day. So for the moment, at least, I'm perfectly happy to go to the snow rather than having it come to me.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:32 PM
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46 Or as translation party might put it, 'Glance yourself her Weddingman once at'.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:32 PM
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Anything missing?

She taunted northerners about how early she could put her garden in each year.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:32 PM
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52: Got the ice cream man to stop coming to their neighborhood.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:32 PM
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52: when she punched the woman at IHOP she said (to paraphrase somewhat): "I'm Amy Bishop, bitch!". That's the best part.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:33 PM
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51: I wish teraz could pity me.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:33 PM
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56: Mixed blessing.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:34 PM
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Also she's related to John Irving. That's the worst one.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:35 PM
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60. Fuck. Throw away the key.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:37 PM
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Anything missing?

Here's something weird.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:41 PM
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34: I'll have you know we grew an orange, right here in north east Ohio. The tree is still alive! It might grow another orange!


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:41 PM
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Snow is great. The weather around here has been perfect for snowshoeing.


Posted by: CJB | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:41 PM
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Grilling in the snow sounds fun, but it would require shovelling (well, I guess forcing my kids to shovel) most of the patio and getting all the snow off the grill, making it un-fun for all concerned.

Besides, being the dutiful father I strive to be, I took my kids skiiing today. My 16 year old announced prior to departure that he did not want to ski but might go tubing. Now here, he does not want to do anything (so he is reading and doing homework). My 10 year old was very enthusiastic about going, but when we got here he said that he did not feel well and so he is sitting here with his brother (he apparently feels well enough to eat pizza from the cafe). My 14 year old is skiiing. We agreed that he would check in every two hours. He checked in after 20 minutes and then again 20 minutes later, when he decided he wanted to eat. He just left to ski more, but said on departure that he was not sure how much more he wanted to ski.

I'm sure glad I drove three hours for this

(Actually, I'm not upset. These things happen and I'm not going to force anyone to ski.)


Posted by: Idealist | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:42 PM
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63: Well done!


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:45 PM
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Blume sucks at Jai Alai.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:48 PM
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Doing homework rather than hitting the slopes? Is the weather unusually sucky or do you have weird kids?


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:50 PM
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Idealist's kids are afraid of coming across as bourgeois.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:51 PM
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62: Interesting. Consistent with some of the local blogger/newspaper comment stuff I found last Friday that the magic petri dish startup company was not happening as expected (it won stuff several years ago). And the neuron computer stuff was almost certainly marginal if not outright bogus.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:52 PM
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re: 68. I love my kids, but yes, they are kind of weird. My fault, I am sure.


Posted by: Idealist | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:52 PM
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62: I'm kind of surprised at the gleeful coverage of this trainwreck of a woman. She killed her brother! She yelled at someone in IHOP! She might have sent a pipe bomb! And now she's a fraud and deserved to be denied tenure! (That last one, by the way, is really fucking gross. People sifting through her published work? Now? After she's already been denied tenure and apparently killed people over it? Yuck.)

Is it as simple as people wanting to feel like her mayhem-making originates from personal rather than structural problems? (I think that's right, by the way, the part about her lunacy having been a preexisting condition rather than her having been driven to violence by a cruel and depraved system. Which it is. A cruel and depraved system, I mean. But it didn't drive this particular person over the edge.) Or is something else going on?


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:54 PM
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71: Generally, not athletic, or don't like being cold or ???


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 1:55 PM
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73: Apparently, generally willing to not subscribe to Unfogged lockstep limited-imagination mindset on what a kid wants to do when at a ski lodge. I for one salute them.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:02 PM
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re: 73. Not athletic. Socially awkward. The two elder ones are in special education classes (Aspergers and ADD). Notwithstanding, they're good kids and more fun to travel with than many kids their age.


Posted by: Idealist | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:03 PM
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75: Potential future members of the Unfoggetariat!
I hope that's not too horrible a thing to say to a parent.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:07 PM
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57 -- Wasn't that 'Dr Amy Bishop, bitch'?


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:11 PM
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re: 76

I should only be so lucky (and it's a fine thing to say to a parent as far as I am concerned.)


Posted by: Idealist | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:11 PM
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Is it as simple as people wanting to feel like her mayhem-making originates from personal rather than structural problems?

I think it's a desire to see her as somebody who was readily identifiable as a threat. "If *I* could see she was a threat, then I don't have to worry about getting shot by a similar loon."

Pretty much every time some horror is visited on unsuspecting people out of the blue there is a round of what-ifs which have the underlying theme "this wouldn't happen to me."


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:22 PM
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77: her entry in the Harvard alumni directory specifies that she wishes to be addressed as Dr. Amy Bishop. Which is douchey under any circumstances, but indicative of utter lack of socialization in the Harvard context.

Also, can we quit with this "Harvard-educated biologist" bullshit? She didn't go there undergrad, so it doesn't count, dammit (sorry, Blume). Unless of course she had won a Nobel Prize or her company had undergone a wildly successful IPO, in which case exceptions can be sometimes made.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:27 PM
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There is a particular curiosity that comes naturally with cases like this. Nearly everybody goes through some scarily dark times, but very few people respond to them by going on killing sprees. So there's an urge to try to flesh out the picture not just to "prove" to yourself that you could have seen the signs in somebody else, but to "prove" to yourself that this person couldn't have been you.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:29 PM
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80.2: Yes because the Harvard undergrad curriculum is so famously rigorous. You mean "Harvard undergrad-admitted".


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:31 PM
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She didn't go there undergrad, so it doesn't count, dammit (sorry, Blume).

Wait, whaa? I'm confused by this not because I so desperately want to claim the Harvard title, but because when you're talking about academics, your graduate school is the relevant educational experience.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:35 PM
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79, 81: Also, train wrecks are interesting, provided you're not on the train.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:36 PM
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And that.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:38 PM
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I refer to myself as "Lake Harriet United Methodist Preschool-educated". That's what counts, dammit.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:38 PM
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Further to 83:
That is to say, no one is bringing that up because How could a member of Crimson Key AND a prestigious finals club do such a thing? but rather as a shorthand for 'top-of-the-line education'.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:39 PM
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82-83: I hope it was apparent that I was poking fun at that particular tendency among Harvard College graduates.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:39 PM
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You went to Lake Harriet Methodist? Total safety preschool.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:44 PM
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Caught in humorlessness in the 3rd degree. You clever Harvard grads just have to rub it in don't you?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:44 PM
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88: Ah, that makes more sense!


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:47 PM
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Harvard-educated codes as booksmart but otherwise clueless. It's exactly who you'd expect to fall apart at the sort of reversal real people experience all the time.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:49 PM
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My junior high school pedigree is the one that best describes me, I think.

not just to "prove" to yourself that you could have seen the signs in somebody else

People didn't like it when I made that kind of decision about a woman in my Ultimate crowd. She was sociable, could hold a pleasant conversation and bring wine to parties, but from what I saw, she didn't think rules applied to her and she didn't care about anything but her. I figured that was a dangerous kind of person and I got pretty serious about minimizing contact with her. People thought I was odd for that. They scolded me for judging her and wasn't she pleasant enough? A couple years later, she moved away.

To date she has not shot up any faculty meetings, although there are odd news stories about her going a.w.o.l. from her job as a public defender (with her boss) and then quitting abruptly.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:49 PM
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Maybe I haven't paid as much attention in the past when academics have gone bad. But it seems like the tenor of the coverage this time really is more gleeful than I've seen before. It's almost like she's a Muslim or something really scary like that. I mean, seriously, poking around in her publication record to justify her having been denied tenure? Stay classy, Orange Satan diarist!


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:49 PM
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(We're going to have to be really catty is we're going to make 1200).


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:49 PM
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89: Fuck you. I got into Blake Preschool but I just decided not to go. Really. And I got just as good of an education at LHUM.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:51 PM
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95: Good spelling there, lawyerboy.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:51 PM
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97 Reading all those 18th century documents keeps me messing up s and f.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:53 PM
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Maybe I haven't paid as much attention in the past when academics have gone bad. But it seems like the tenor of the coverage this time really is more gleeful than I've seen before. It's almost like she's a Muslim or something really scary like that. I mean, seriously, poking around in her publication record to justify her having been denied tenure? Stay classy, Orange Satan diarist!

That's not exactly "poking around in her publication record". It's her most recent publication, and the list of authors alone shows clear signs of deluded thinking.

And when was the last time an academic went bad in a hail of gunfire? Gang Lu in 1991? What are you comparing this to?


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:55 PM
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Pretty much every time some horror is visited on unsuspecting people out of the blue there is a round of what-ifs which have the underlying theme "this wouldn't happen to me."

Sister Elizabeth Ann predicted in the 6th grade that I would be shot in a bar fight. That seemed reasonable to me at the time.

We didn't realize that with the invention of the Internet, I would be able to pursue my hobby - provoking rage - from a safe distance.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:58 PM
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She was sociable, could hold a pleasant conversation and bring wine to parties, but from what I saw, she didn't think rules applied to her and she didn't care about anything but her.

You played ultimate with my ex?


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 2:59 PM
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I mean, seriously, poking around in her publication record to justify her having been denied tenure? Stay classy, Orange Satan diarist!

In what universe do people talk about conflicts without trying to figure out who was right? It's often futile, but off limits?


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 3:00 PM
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A little self-snark, just to move it along. I see that the most prestigious school that I successfully completed (as opposed to attended for a while and then moved on) is the place where I went to Kindergarten.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 3:01 PM
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Only if your real name is Eddy. And you lived a couple blocks from me.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 3:12 PM
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Harvard-educated codes as booksmart but otherwise clueless. It's exactly who you'd expect to fall apart at the sort of reversal real people experience all the time.

Don't worry about me. I'm fine.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 3:24 PM
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It's almost like she's a woman Muslim or something really scary like that.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 3:37 PM
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102: No, it's not off limits at all to try to determine right and wrong. But in this case, I think the jury's long since in: the dead colleagues have the moral high ground. Given that, trying to adjudicate her tenure case strikes me as pretty much beside the point and at least a bit gratuitous. After all, it's clear that she has a history of violence and rage having nothing to do with her failed career. So the Kos post felt, to me at least, like piling on. That said, I haven no interest in defending this woman.


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 3:42 PM
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That said, I haven no interest in defending this woman.

Good thing you put in that disclaimer. You're already a known terrorist sympathizer with all your human rights/due process claptrap. I was worried you'd gone soft on academic maniacs too.

For my part, I think all of this stuff is interesting. Did she intentionally kill her brother 20 years ago? Enquiring minds want to know!


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:01 PM
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Trainwrecks are exciting. Loud Noises! Bright sparks! Shiny things moving fast in unexpected directions! Not staring at that... don't make us be something we aren't, ari. Zardoz would have seen this.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:02 PM
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I assume I missed an earlier link to this given the ongoing discussion, but it can't be linked too often.

And on Amy Bishop, I'm waiting for the xkcd cartoon before I judge.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:07 PM
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After all, it's clear that she has a history of violence and rage having nothing to do with her failed career.

Perhaps overscrupulously, one notes that the files of an embarrassed Massachusetts police department are not perfect evidence of culpability.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:23 PM
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108: Well, fine, if you must know know the truth, I think academics should be allowed to kill with impunity.

109: I really didn't mean to cast aspersions on anyone here. As I think about it, what's probably happening is that I don't usually pay any attention to these stories -- I'm too busy reading Rilke, donchaknow -- and so have no idea how this kind of news gets covered. Which is to say, if you want to keep sniffing her panties*, you go right ahead.

* Situational use of "panties" is authorized, so long as "moist" and "creamy" are nowhere nearby.


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:24 PM
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111: This is a good point. Still and all, I think death by pressing is the only fair and just punishment for her.


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:25 PM
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Well, fine, if you must know know the truth, I think academics should be allowed to kill with impunity.

You obviously mean *tenured* academics.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:25 PM
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113: I think death by pressing is the only fair and just punishment for her.

Because she wasn't tenured and killed the tenured.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:27 PM
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113: More weight!


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:27 PM
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Seriously, JP, some things really don't need to be spelled out. It's not like the people here are untenured savages.


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:28 PM
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Well, fine, if you must know know the truth, I think academics should be allowed to kill with impunity.

Only if they do so with the sword (or, bowing to tradition, wooden facsimile thereof). No guns. Also, they have to commit suicide if their books are remaindered.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:29 PM
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Trainwrecks are exciting. Loud Noises! Bright sparks! Shiny things moving fast in unexpected directions!

Fact.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:30 PM
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84: I should think the people on the train would be the most interested of all.


Posted by: Benquo | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 4:50 PM
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Sister Elizabeth Ann predicted in the 6th grade that I would be shot in a bar fight.

Well my Grandmother told me she was going to kill me and tell God that I'd died.


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:10 PM
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86: Could all of the current and former Minnesotans please out themselves? It gets really confusing for me when I find out that there are secret Minnesotans around.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:23 PM
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I think Minnesotans might outnumber Californians on Unfogged. Strange, that.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:25 PM
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122: Your countrymen are doing themselves extremely proud right now, Nati.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:26 PM
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I am not now, nor have I ever been, a Minnesotan.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:29 PM
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124: Yeah, I really tuned out of the Olympics around 1928 or so. It's just too professional nowadays.

I did see a bit of the women's luge and snowboard cross last night. I am still not convinced that luge is any more of a sport than golf or bocce ball or noodling. But, by the same token, it's strange that there was much resistance to putting snowboarding in.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:36 PM
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I have cousins native to Minnesota, my brother lives in Mpls, and I once dated a gal from St. Cloud. (She even made me apple pancakes when I stopped by to visit some years later). But no, not a Minnesotan.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:37 PM
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126: Yes, but this is curling. The all MN team.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:38 PM
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(I also dated a gal from White Bear Lake, but we didn't part on terms as friendly.)


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:41 PM
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In fact, I've never even been to Minnesota.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:43 PM
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My MN heritage is a fairly open secret, I reckon.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:44 PM
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I once attended a sort of honors program in Minnesota.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:45 PM
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Yes, but this is curling. The all MN team

Come on baby put the rock in the house


Posted by: CJB | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:45 PM
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Also not Minnesotan, but I can see it from my house. OK not quite, it would involve a 15 min walk.


Posted by: CJB | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:48 PM
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133: Now you see why the curlers have these.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:48 PM
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131: That was only a week ago! I'm not even up to 2008 in the fucking archives yet!


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 5:56 PM
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or, bowing to tradition, wooden facsimile thereof). No guns. Also, they have to commit suicide if their books are remaindered.

Tenured profs are vampires? Damn, that end to mandatory retirement ages is even more of a problem than I thought.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 7:36 PM
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Not all bloodsuckers are vampires, tkm.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 7:53 PM
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Some are just vermin.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 7:54 PM
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I've mentioned this before, but I will again, to further lay claim to my intellectual property.

When I was in graduate school, I came up with an idea for a horror movie called Chronic Fatigue Vampires. The premise was that the vampires never kill their victims, they just drain enough blood to leave them tired and easily manipulated. The vampires would all be tenured faculty, and the victims all graduate students. My shrink at the time said that the victims should willingly stay with the vampires, and, if freed, be drawn to other people who remind them of the vampires.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 8:07 PM
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140 reminds me of William S. Burroughs's vampire monologue.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 8:10 PM
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The premise was that the vampires never kill their victims, they just drain enough blood to leave them tired and easily manipulated.

That was the original idea for zombies, right? Hypnotized slaves.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 8:13 PM
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141: I don't know that one, but it is perfectly likely Burroughs beat me to it.

142: Yeah, the pre-Romero zombies were like that. But you weren't supposed to imagine them as having an interior life. They were just shells--in that way they were like Romero zombies or even philosophy of mind zombies.

I really wanted a horror movie that captured the feeling that something is wrong in your life, but you just can't put together the energy to change it, or even articulate what is wrong.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 8:25 PM
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I really wanted a horror movie

But instead you got a PhD! Talk about the short end of the stick.


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 8:33 PM
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I was going to barbecue, but my grill scared me.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 8:37 PM
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My upper Midwestern roots must remain a mystery, I am afraid.

There were big lakes around. I say no more.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 02-17-10 9:26 PM
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My shrink at the time said that the victims should willingly stay with the vampires

Was this a prescriptive judgement or an artistic one? If the former, congratulations on finding another shrink.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 4:17 AM
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No, no. New twist on the "corporations = people" argument: the victims are all junior lawyers and paralegals and the vampire is the firm itself. Could


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 4:33 AM
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The vampires would all be tenured faculty, and the victims all graduate students.

In the Addiction, the protagonist is an NYU philosophy graduate student. Near the end, she passes her orals, invites her dissertation committee to a party, where they're devoured by her and other vampires. I'm not normally one for horror movies, but I liked that scene.


Posted by: beamish | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 4:56 AM
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It's the last day of 3GSM or MWC as we're now meant to call it, and frankly, if the zombies rose, you wouldn't pick them out of the crowd. Mind you, I was out until 3am last night, so I'm probably the zombie's zombie myself.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 5:37 AM
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PS, has anyone done a Zombies vs. Vampires movie? Bonus points if the heroine is a she-werewolf.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 5:42 AM
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Double bonus points if somebody bestirs themselves to invent a new type of undead which hasn't been overdone to exhaustion. Or even digs out an obscure one from somebody's mythology.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 5:47 AM
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Zombies: West African, colonial import via Haiti.
Vampires: Mediterranean/Balkans.
Werewolves: the North - Nordics and Germany.

What kind of undead do they have in China?


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:14 AM
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152: Hellboy is quite good at that, disinterring less well-known stuff like Wendigo and weird Malaysian and Japanese disembodied-head forest spirits.

Maybe it's time for Brownies? (Problem: little people who do your laundry are not actually very threatening.) Or changelings? Really dig into all that maternal anxiety.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:17 AM
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I really wanted a horror movie that captured the feeling that something is wrong in your life, but you just can't put together the energy to change it, or even articulate what is wrong.

Rebel Without a Cause? Bertolucci's The Conformist? Any number of French movies the titles of which I can't recall?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:20 AM
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little people who do your laundry are not actually very threatening welcome.

Fixed that.

Alternatively, could we base a movie on aliens trying to contact the British Home Secretary (presumably to appeal against their immigration applications being turned down)?


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:24 AM
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What kind of undead do they have in China?

Party Elders.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:30 AM
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151: That's the plot of those Underworld movies that don't look very good.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:42 AM
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampires_Vs._Zombies


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:47 AM
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The Underworld pictures are vampire v. werewolf, I think. I haven't seen any of them despite the obvious attraction (Ms Beckinsale). Vampire v. zombie might be quite good given that zombies are immune to vampires' mind tricks, glamour etc, and also presumably don't have any blood that isn't already coagulated.

156:


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:48 AM
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Idea. Rather than Contact the Elderly, Contact the Undead.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:49 AM
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Obvious quote: "Tradition means giving votes to the most obscure of all classes, our ancestors. It is the democracy of the dead. Tradition refuses to submit to the small and arrogant oligarchy of those who merely happen to be walking about."

Also, Charlie Stross' "The Jennifer Morgue" which has, as a plot point, a Soviet device for communicating with the dead. Specifically, dead Politburo members - so that, even if the US managed a decapitation strike, the USSR's deceased leadership would be able to order a nuclear counterattack from the afterlife.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:56 AM
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Rather than Help The Aged, Help The Deceased.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 6:56 AM
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FROM THE HAUNTED LOINS OF THE FEVER-WITCH THE DEMON'S LARVAE SPRANG!


Posted by: OPINIONATED NICE PETE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:02 AM
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William S. Burroughs on vampires (among other things) including goofy backing music.

Chinese hopping vampires are great. You know, you're dead, why not hop?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:15 AM
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153: There's a werewolf story in Petronius. It is insane.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:22 AM
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148: This is sort of the premise of Wolfram & Hart, the evil law firm from the tv show Angel.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:26 AM
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166. Unlike the rest of Petronius, which is totally the kind of stuff that happens to you all the time.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:28 AM
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|| The internet security policy at my workplace blocks certain sites it deems inappropriate, among them BPhd, which it deems "adult/pornography" content. All well and good if they want to block shit, and I can follow a link asking them to unblock this what with it not actually being porn. The problem is that it is being blocked when I attempt to surf on my BB -- which the firm does *not* in any way pay for. Is there a setting on the BB I can change myself so it is not routing my BB browsing over the firm's servers? And should I assume this means my firm could, if it wished, be tracking my BB browsing activity? It's not a huge deal, but I'm irked to have limitations imposed on *my* fucking phone|>


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:34 AM
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should I assume this means my firm could, if it wished, be tracking my BB browsing activity?

If you're getting to the internet through their servers, then yes.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:37 AM
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Are you using the firm's wifi with your blackberry? Can you switch to browsing over the cell network?


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:37 AM
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Try using Opera Mini for Blackberry instead of the built-in browser, which sucks. There's a chance it might not get routed through the blocker.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:38 AM
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What kind of undead do they have in China?

Chinese vampires hop on one leg. This is because the Chinese tie corpses' feet together to prevent non-hopping undead.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:56 AM
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What kind of undead do they have in China?

MOLES!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 7:57 AM
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160: I've seen them all, and they are pretty good for the genre. For some reason I'm fascinated by how the transition from human to werewolf is handled in movies, and Underworld handles it well, far better than most.

If you like werewolf movies the gold standard is Dog Soldiers. Absolutely the best horror movie ever.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:02 AM
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I remember someone postulating that you can't have a proper tradition of horror stories until the rise of science, because you need the audience to know deep down that these monsters are just made up. Along those lines, I wonder if Chinese folk religion still has too much of a grip on people to make horror movies out of the hopping zombie things.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:03 AM
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171: I have no idea!

172: Opera works. I just get frustrated because there is no quick way to get to the bottom of long threads in Opera.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:03 AM
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I just get frustrated because there is no quick way to get to the bottom of long threads in Opera.

Yep, you just have to wait till the fat lady sings.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:09 AM
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I remember someone postulating that you can't have a proper tradition of horror stories until the rise of science

166 tends to argue against this.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:12 AM
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179: Yeah, there are Greek and Roman ghost and horror stories -- in one of Pliny's letters the ghosts even rattle chains like Jacob Marley! Also in Petronius: a fairly horrid little golem-ish story.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:18 AM
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Confidential to OFE:

Erat autem miles, fortis tamquam Orcus. Apoculamus nos circa gallicinia, luna lucebat tamquam meridie. Venimus inter monimenta: homo meus coepit ad stelas facere, secedo ego cantabundus et stelas numero. Deinde ut respexi ad comitem, ille exuit se et omnia vestimenta secundum viam posuit. Mihi anima in naso esse, stabam tamquam mortuus. At ille circumminxit vestimenta sua, et subito lupus factus est. Nolite me iocari putare; ut mentiar, nullius patrimonium tanti facio. Sed, quod coeperam dicere, postquam lupus factus est, ululare coepit et in silvas fugit.

Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:18 AM
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177.last: No matter what browser it should work to click on "comments" for any of the recent comments listed on the front page sidebar and that takes you to that comment (at or near the bottom of the thread). Limited to active threads of course.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:19 AM
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181. I love Mihi anima in naso esse. Have a link.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:28 AM
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Link fixed.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:31 AM
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Asante sana.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:34 AM
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183: I love that! (I love the nose bit, too, as well as "facere" for "shit" and "circumminxit" is probably my favorite Latin word.)


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:41 AM
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Karibu.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 8:54 AM
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Well, that exhausts my vocabulary in that language. Can we go back to the undead?


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:01 AM
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I also know "Jambo", but then I'm out as well.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:08 AM
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The Greeks invented science. QED.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:12 AM
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176: there are a shit ton of hopping vampire movies (along with all kinds of other supernatural shit: ghosts, superpowered eunuchs, giant tongue monsters) so I'd say no.

If you'd like to see a truly dementedly awesome Chinese supernatural monkey business kind of movie, check out Tsui Hark's A Chinese Ghose Story (and its many sequels). For a more serious but still loopy take on Chinese undead, check out The Bride With White Hair.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:12 AM
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Opera works. I just get frustrated because there is no quick way to get to the bottom of long threads in Opera.

On my dumbphone, pressing "#3" jumps to the bottom of the page (or the top, if already at the bottom). Don't know if the BB version has the same feature.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:13 AM
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Fuck you, Einstein.


Posted by: SB's phone | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:19 AM
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192: Well look at that! Problem solved.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:21 AM
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There's an animated A Chinese Ghost Story which is similarly wack and features extra giant tongue monster action.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:23 AM
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Chinese vampires hop on one leg. This is because the Chinese tie corpses' feet together to prevent non-hopping undead.

This makes no sense. It is impossible to hop on one leg if your feet are tied together. Think about it.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:24 AM
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Maybe if they're tied one on top of the other, like Jesus' nailed feet.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:29 AM
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As for the more general problem of work snarfing your packets: There are two, maybe three browser profiles on the BB, at least on the one I played with. There's the "BlackBerry Browser", the "Internet Browser", the "Wireless Provider Branded Browser", and goodness knows what else. You may have better luck with one than with the others. If so, someone more BB-sapient than I should be able to tell you how to fix the offending profile(s).


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:29 AM
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197 - The hopping vampires lean at a 45 degree angle, so only the edge of one foot makes contact with the earth.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:44 AM
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like Jesus' nailed feet

I was briefly taken with the notion of a hopping messiah emerging from the tomb, but apparently "hopping Jesus" has already entered and departed the lexicon.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 9:52 AM
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I used to know someone who was firmly convinced that the character Festus on Gunsmoke was modelled after Hephaistos.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 10:37 AM
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201: Wrong thread.

Or a pretty non-sequitur convergence.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 12:52 PM
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Huh. Probably no hyphen in that word.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 12:52 PM
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202.1: Fuck you, Einstein.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 12:55 PM
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Almost 71,000 Google hits for "fuck you Einstein", though an awful lot of them are pointing to the same picture.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 1:01 PM
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in one of Pliny's letters the ghosts even rattle chains like Jacob Marley!

My favorite is the ghost who keeps cutting Pliny's servants' hair. (I imagine it used ectoplasm for hair gel.)


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 1:09 PM
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191: Who was undead in Bride with White Hair? The Foley Twins?


Posted by: clew | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 5:16 PM
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207: for some reason I thought the bride was. Perhaps I misremembered.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-18-10 5:23 PM
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